كم تسوى حياتك ؟

      مرة قال لي والدي بأن ننتبه عندما نكون مارّين في إحدى الطرق السريعة فقد يقفز أحد العمالات الأجنبية فجأة بدون سابق إنذار من بين الشجيرات التي تفصل ما بين الطريق حتى لا ينتبه السائق لظهور أحدهم أمامه و يسقط جثة هامدة ! قرر أن ينهي حياته هذا العامل حتى  تُدفع ديّة لأهله مقدارها مليون ريال .. ضحّى بحياته لأن راتبه لا يكفي لسد احتياجاته المعيشية في هذا البلد غير أنّ الباقي لن يكفي ليرسله لأهله الذين ينتظرون رجوعه و الشوق يقتلهم لسماع أخباره .. لكنه انتحر! .. يبدو أن نفس واحدة نقصت و لكن عائلة كاملة ستعيش عيشة كريمة بسبب تضحيته " الإنتحارية" ! هل ما فعله إيثار لنفسه حتى يعيش غيره ؟ هل ستفعل الشيء نفسه لو لم يكن عاقبة الإنتحار النار ؟

ثبت في الصحيحين عن النبي عليه الصلاة والسلام – أنه قال: "من قتل نفسه بحديدة فحديدته في يده في نار جهنم يجأبها بطنه خالداً مخلداً فيها أبدا، ومن قتل نفسه بسم فسمه في يده يتحساه في نار جهنم خالداً مخلداً فيها أبدا، ومن تردى في جبل فإنه يتردى في جهنم خالداً مخلداً فيها" رواه البخاري و مسلم

      ما قيمتك بالدنيا ؟ هل تسوى بليون ،اثنين ، عشرة ، ألف .. إلخ من الأرقام الهائلة التي لن تضمن لك عيشة هنيئة و راحة البال ، يقال بأن من لديه المال يستطيع شراء ما يريد حتى الأحبة ليشاركوه فرحته ، لكن هل يستطيع شراء السعادة  و الصحة؟  كم من ثريٍّ تبرع بثروته للحيوانات اللاجئة كأنه يعلم بأن الثروة تعتبر نقمة أكثر من أن تكون نعمة !  هناك من يقيس قيمته و أهمية وجوده بعدد أصحابه  في الشبكات الاجتماعية ( فيسبوك -تويتر-متابعين يوتيوب ..الخ) و الذين يعتبرون حقيقة أكثر عدداً من الأصدقاء الفعليّين !

 قرأت أحد الكتب و كان فيه الكثير من الحكم ومنها "المرء يكسب الناس عن طريق إحدى الثلاث : المال ، الحب  ، أو الخوف "~ Game of Thrones.

فكيف كسبت الأشخاص حولك ؟ الأب قد يكسب عائلته  بماله ، و الأم بحبها لهم لكن من ذا الذي يكسبهم بطغيانه و زرع الخوف في أعماقهم حتى لا يتم تجاوزه ؟ ربما الأخ الأكبر، المدرسين ، المدير و من لديه سلطة على رسم حدود لتصرفاتك ومعاقبتك عليها! 

نرجع لموضوعنا ، كم تسوى حياتك أجيالنا القادمة ما مصيرهم عندما يتم تربيتهم من الآن على أنّ المال هو أساس الحياة؟ ما مدى سطحية تفكيرهم الذي سيكون بناءاً عليه قراراتهم المستقبلية ؟ هل سيلعب الحظ دوره في تعليمهم مبادئ و قيم الحياة أم سيضلون تائيين في قوقعتهم الشفافة ؟ 

Three Letters to Madness - Part Two

     I left the last post with an open end question I promised to answer in this post. The question of what do I want? I believe that to find out what we want we must first ask the second three letter word of madness; How. To be more specific “How do you feel”. By feel I mean both emotionally and logically (mentally). So let’s jump into it.

     Many times people will tell you one of the greatest lies ever; that you are the most honest when you are drunk, high, or angry (an extreme state). You announce your “true” feelings or opinion on the matter at hand. This is almost as bad as people believing that to give into our primal instincts and urges is to be free! How we feel is a question that has created an entire science and economy around it; from psychology to self help books to movies and T.V shows. It’s all there to make the answer easier. You either belong in one of these boxes we have created for you.

     Why do we trust others with our emotions? Because we don’t trust ourselves, admit it most of us at some point or another found comfort in just going with what people said. It absolves us of all faults. I was tricked! I did what they wanted me to! How you feel should never be left for others. It’s yours and only yours. Then why is it so confusing? Don’t I know myself?

     Yes as a matter of fact you do. You just fall into the same mistake we all did. We believed in one true everlasting right answer. The reality is that there is no “one everlasting truth” everything changes. How we feel is an ever changing phenomena it is situational. God Himself does not change and if He does we would not know, however, what does change is how we feel about God. When young we ask for strength and fun, then we seek wisdom and a career, then it’s a wife and kids, then life to see them grow up… etc. This example is just one of many. Who we are and How we feel are not questions with one answer, but a novel with many chapters.

Three Letters to Madness - Part One

As of late I find myself more and more drawn into the inner workings of my mind. I wonder what my motives were for doing -or not doing- little things like making a phone call, sending a text, or the first thing to do in the morning. I started this because I was sick of people telling me the answer to a question only I can answer. The question that we so often avoid answering; a simple three letter word that can forever shape anyone’s future. WHO are you?


The answer is so complex it’s often very hard to answer. Now it doesn’t help that we are raised to think that there is only one answer. This in itself is false. The world is ever changing, thus so are the truths and lies that we live by. Yesterday’s correct answers are today’s falsehoods. So, back to the original question, WHO are you?


You may be thinking one of the following: I am my blood (family legacy …etc), I am my accomplishments (career, money, power...etc), I am a humble servant of the Lord… the list goes on and on. No matter what answer you give the others always seem equally or at least semi equally appealing.


So, what is the answer to this question? It’s simple. So simple you will laugh. The answer is whatever you want it to be. Which leaves us with another question; What do I want? To answer that read my next post…

فَرضيّة اختلاف البشرية

الصورة

     كانت تجول في خاطري فرضية عنّا ، نحن البشر و ما يميزنا عن الآخرين .. هل نحن نسخ مستنسخة من أسلافنا أم كل شخص منّا مختلف عن الآخر ؟ ما أسس اختلافنا أو تشابهنا ؟ مالذي أثّر على تطور البشرية و كيف يتغير الآخرون ؟
قد تكون فرضيتي خطرت على بالك لكن لم تعِرها الإهتمام و تركتها تختفي بين خبايا الأفكار لتندثر حتى لا تكون مدخل لمتاهاتك الفكرية و بالتالي تؤثر على اعتقاداتك و تصرفاتك لاحقاً .. سأحاول أن أبسط الفرضية حتى تصل لك الفكرة بطريقة سلسلة عن طريق طرح بعض التساؤلات و استخدام بعض الأمثلة .

    بدايتنا كانت عبارة عن بويضة لُقحت و نضجت حتى تكون الجنين.. بغض النظر عن التفاصيل التي تلت هذه المرحلة ، ما الذي يحدد اختلافاتنا وثقافتنا بين دائرة الدين ، الأهل ، البيئة التعليمية ، الأصدقاء ،المال ، الطموح وغيرها ؟  .. مثلا ما هي مالفروقات ما بين تربية الأم بوجود الأب أو بغيابه ، أو إذا كان جميعهما مشغولان بالحياة أو إذا كانت حياتهما انقضت قبل أن يربيا الطفل و يتكفل أحد الأقارب أو الجهات المعنية بتربيته ؟ هل لبيئة الشخص تأثير على مستقبله ؟ هل لنا القدرة على تغيير البيئة لتتلائم مع حاجاتنا أو البيئة هي التي تحدد لنا ماهية احتياجاتنا !  البعض يولد فقيراً و يشقى طول عمره لإيجاد لقمة العيش و بعد ذلك يأتي أجله و تنتقل أملاكه لورثته ، الآخر يولد و ينطبق عليه المثل ( فيه فمه ملعقة ذهب ) و قد يكون ابن الفقير الذي أصبح ثرياً بفضل الله ثم بفضل جهد والده ، سؤالي هنا : هل سيقوم الشخص هذا بتقدير الحياة كتقدير والده لها؟  هل سيقوم بإهدار الثروة على حياته بحكم عدم تعبه في جمعها ؟  أم سيقوم بجمع المزيد لأبنائه حتى ينعموا بحياة أفضل ؟


    مضحك  لدرجة البكاء ما نشاهده حولنا ، فهناك ابن العقيد صاحب السمعة الطيبة  المسجون بقضية سرقة ، و هذه ابنة إمام المسجد التي تقضي آواخر لياليها بنشر فضائح صديقاتها أو مكالمة أحدهم  مقابل مبلغ مالي، وإستشاري أنف و أذن و حنجرة الذي يقضي فترات استراحة القهوة مع سيجارته العزيزة ، فما صحة مقولة " باب النجّار مخلوع " ! النقطة هنا هي أن ما نتصوره عن الآخرين يختلف عن حقيقة واقعهم .. البعض يجب أن يمر بظروف لتغيره للأفضل و البعض الآخر يقرأ عن ظروف الآخرين ليتغير! منّا من يتأثر بالكلمة الطيبة، و الآخرلا ينفع معه إلّا القسوة ! نختلف في تعاملنا مع أنفسنا و مع الآخرين لكن مالذي يجبرنا على الإختلاف!


     ختاماً ... جربوا متعة مشاهدة السيارات في إحدى الطرق السريعة بينما تكونون واقفين على أحد جسور المشاة التي تقطع الشارع , كلنا بشر خلقنا من نفس واحدة لكن ما الذي يجعلنا مختلفين ؟  

The Human Vessel

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     It has always seemed odd to me how much we marvel about science. We as humans love to brag about our achievements, development, and futures. Yet rarely do we really appreciate the subtle marvels of our everyday surroundings. Like what?


     I won’t go into scripture about the human body, but it’s important to at least mention that almost all major beliefs (Islam, Christianity, Judaism, or even the much older Hinduism, Buddhism...etc) all marveled and respected the human vessel -body-. As ancient as it is, for it’s the only body we have ever known, we still do not fully understand it. Moreover, we still do not see the subtle, yet highly effective lessons it can teach us.


     The most obvious lesson to me, is how many dissimilar things come together to create one harmonious form -the body-. Bound by mutual needs such as blood, water, nutrition....etc, each of these unique dissimilar parts plays a role. One thinks, the other breaths, the other walks...etc. All of these parts are not equal, but they are all important for the body to function harmoniously. Now why don’t we tale this lesson and apply it to life.

"Democracy is the worst form of government except for all those others that have been tried." Winston Churchill

     In politics we can apply this lesson by realizing that not all parts of a community should vote. If we all listened to our hearts and minds rather than other organs we would all be much happier and harmonious.

“Do not train a child to learn by force or harshness; but direct them to it by what amuses their minds, so that you may be better able to discover with accuracy the peculiar bent of the genius of each.” Plato

     In education we focus too much on the mind and not enough on the heart; We don’t educate people to understand that like the human body every family, town, city, and nation needs more than just a mind. By this I mean that we must learn to accept and appreciate all parts of society no matter how little. Unequal they may be, but they are as critical as any.



     I could go on and on, however, if this blog post gets any longer I will suffer the wrath of a very angry co-author. Therefore, I'll leave it as it is. I believe that God created us and gave us all the tools to be great. All we need to do is stop trying to reinvent everything he gave us and really look carefully at all He has provided. Nature has survived and thrived far longer than mankind, maybe we can learn a bit from that fact.

Between Here and There

          Life like all things is simple yet complex, Lovely yet ugly, Fun yet dull, worth living yet not. This is the sad reality that escapes us in our dreams. In our dreams everything is clear; no matter how complex the dream you still enjoy it. A hundred million ideas all come together all to insight a simple emotion, Happiness. Yet in reality it’s not so simple. Happiness is relative, but everyone wants to tell you how to be happy.

     In life we live between two opposites; Reality and Dreams. Both are equally as important. life without reality will get you nowhere, on the other hand, Reality without the dare to dream is mute and dull. I believe they are like colors; Black and White can create an amazing image, however, without color it will never be alive. At the same time without Darkness and light (Black and White) we would never be able to see these colors. This is the relationship between dreams and reality. 

     In life we all want simple things. The same things - in essence -.However, our means to achieve these simple things come at a great cost. To think! Thinking is our mortal coil. The more you think the more you see and in return the more "realistic" you become. This is one side of the equation. The flip side is to achieve these simple things with another sort of great cost, To NOT think. Relax! Take it easy! It’s all good! You can’t change it, so don’t bother. Both these theories are utter nonsense.

     Extreme is the enemy of progress. Both examples above are too extreme. Life has taught me this the hard way. Now, before I give my own theory about "How to save a life" I would like to state that this is MY way of seeing things (my perspective). By this I mean that you should never do as I did. Contemplate, get advice, and listen to your heart and the hearts of those you trust, and then and only then make a decision. If it happens to be the same as mine then so be it. But, never allow someone else to think for you. I digress...

     I believe that for each situation in life you must do the math. Every time you buy something you do math; you calculate how much you have, how much the item costs, and if you can afford it. Then you calculate the change due to you if you didn't have the exact amount. All this is done sometimes without you even knowing. The same should be applied in life; however, you must be aware! Because unlike money that comes and goes this is a decision that can never be undone. I’ll explain.

     Dreams are useful to escape reality when faced with adversity. Reality is best used when facing adversity of another sort. In dreams the adversity may be something totally out of your control; that is when you must dream to survive, so that you may strike when it comes into your control. Reality is your first line of defense start off with it. Fight as hard as you can and then some! Push until you almost break then and only then go to dreams. 

     Remember that the world is not 2D it’s not even 3D its actually 4D; The fourth dimension being time and space. So always look at things from all angles, you will be surprised how easily you will find reasons hidden just a side step away. Thinking is a double edged swords use it wisely. Random example incoming be aware. Thinking is like chewing gum! Too little isn’t enough, too much hurts, and just enough is perfect.

If you don’t stand for something then you are falling for everything!

The Adam's Effect

     Abraham Adams is a fictional character from the novel (Joseph Andrews, written in 1742). Despite being extremely educated and kind hearted,he still remains a fool. The Adam's effect is my modern day version of this character. In our day and age we have all the information we need at the click of a button. The Internet has made us all scholars, but do we have the wisdom to cultivate this knowledge into action? The quest for knowledge has been drastically changed. There is no longer a lack of knowledge, but an abundance of it! 

     Sadly we have not dealt with this change adequately. We still teach the same way we have always taught and think the same way we have always thought. It is my belief that we are squandering a lot of time and effort on a system long out of date. This opinion is not mine alone. Many prominent scholars like Sir Ken Robinson and Edward De Bono have written amazing books and given enlightening talks on this issue. I highly recommend looking them both up if you have not heard or read about them. The current system of education and thinking is a  self-fulfilling prophecy. It is too big to change and too important to "mess with". So what can we do?

     The good thing about thinking is that it never stops. We never stop thinking. Yes, we do have lapses of judgment and can make one bad decision after another. But that is not lack of thinking its simply bad thinking. Thinking is something that can be evolved, regardless of age, gender, race, social status. Unlike the traditional notion of intelligence and the silly notion of IQ. Great thinking can be achieved. All it takes is a will and a little soul searching. All it takes is the ability to challenge the unchallenged. By this I do not mean to simply blindly argue and second guess everything. I simply mean consider other options and circumstances. let me give an example taken from Edward De Bono's "Think Before its Too Late". Lying is always bad, a person should never lie. However, lying can be a very moral choice in a very narrow and extreme circumstance; A boy is being chased by a murderer. The boy runs into an ally, the ally forks and the boy goes right. The murderer comes in the ally seconds after the boy has taken the turn. He asks you "Which way did the boy go?". Now in this very extreme example what do you do? tell the truth? lie? say nothing? 

     We have become so obsessed with science, math, technology and other "modern" forms of intelligence, to the point where we have forgotten the importance of simplicity and everyday things. Language is by far superior to any science. Without it all communication breaks down. Even in your own head. When confused and unable to explain your feelings (to yourself) one becomes frustrated. I may write a separate article about this later. Back to the main topic. Thinking is an art. The more you consciously work on it the better you become at it. Schools and colleges are not enough. They are focused on judgment and evaluation. They have set categories and people must fit into one or the other (A+, A, B+, B ...and so on). However, these categories are not accurate when it comes to how well people can think. It has been proven that sometimes the brightest of students fail at multi-choice questions, because they are able to think of situations where more than one of the choices may be applicable (like the example above about lying). 

     In the end I believe that if we just take a little more time out of our day to really think and improve our thinking we can achieve so much more. Knowledge is power, however, power is useless without the wisdom to wield it.